Freedom's Eve

Tonight is my husband's last night of captivity. In less than 12 hours he will be a free man, at least physically. His spirit and his mind have never been imprisoned. 

I have no words for the way I feel right now. This is too big to describe! 

Last Sunday I visited my husband for what I hope will be the last time. As I sat in the visiting room, I was flooded with memories; how I imagine one's life flashes before we die. I saw myself as a young woman, nervously waiting, butterflies in my stomach. I thought about the countless ordeals and hurdles just to see my loved one. I experienced the sweat, that even when it's freezing outside, manages to invade my temples. Only someone who has lived this prison-from-the-outside experience can relate. 

While I sat in the visiting room I noticed the young families, the parents visiting their adult children, the in-love couples, and I thought about the advice I would give someone who is new to this life: 

*Keep your cool- many people in charge will test, humiliate, judge, and even taunt you... don't give negativity any energy. 

*Clothing matters- increase your chances of easy processing by keeping up with and following the dress codes, you'll save a lot of time, money, and stress. 

*Don't take your stress out on your kids- they're stressed too. The abundance of rules, long waiting times, and unexpected events can be trying for adults, imagine little people! 

*Be mindful that your loved one is in a living hell, they will do and say things that upset you... don't take it personal! 

Maintaining a relationship with an incarcerated person is challenging. The system is set up to push us away from our loved ones. It takes courage and resolve to keep going and it's hard for everyone involved, on both sides of the wall. 

So, tonight, I am reflecting on the last 30 years so I can move forward. Like a long-awaited birth, I am ready to receive my new life. Let's do this!